Well, there we have it. A whole year that set out to hate me, tear me down limb from limb, tear my family apart, as well as distance myself from anyone that cared or could help me, has been defeated. It wails in despair and is in my rear-view mirror as I drive along the road ahead. I look into 2016 to bring great happiness and prosperity in my life, and I will have it no other way. 🙂
So, maybe wording it like that is a bit……melodramatic, but I want the point to be clear that 2015 was incredibly difficult to me and those around me. I was tested, prodded, poked, and even forced into situations that tested me physically, socially, mentally, spiritually, and even digitally (an area that usually doesn’t attack me, so to speak) and it was exhausting. I am glad that it’s over and 2016 can bring in a new era of nothing but positive things. I won’t have it any other way. This is not going to be a post about how terrible things are, because THEY AREN’T. The last month, while stressful, was amazing and I am ready for what 2016 will bring to me and I say “bring it on!”.
My mental state is the best it’s been in YEARS. I am seeing things so much more clearly than I ever have before. I am remembering things from my childhood that I have long repressed to protect myself from it. I am staring my past in the eye, facing it face to face, and I’m not blinking. It can back down. It can be the bottom of the totem pole this year. I’m not budging.
It’s crazy to think that just months ago, I was an absolute mess. I couldn’t hold anything together, and now, here I am as about as positive as I have been in years, if not my entire life. The psychiatric help and therapy that I have been receiving has been amazing, and has really shown me a lot. It has guided me down the right path. As I sit here and reflect on the past year, and all the trauma it brought forward to me and my family, I can honestly say, “meh”. I came out on top. I came out a better and more resilient individual. I am ready for WHATEVER lies in store for me ahead.
To those that I have shared my stories of trials and tribulations with, in further detail than I have on here, due to discussing your life, or your anxieties or whatever the case may have been. I am here to tell you that it can be done. It WILL be done. Do what we have talked about. Focus on the positives. Focus on the “victories”. Focus on YOU. If you need to talk, I’m here for you. I will advocate for you and I will help you push through the darkness.
A more Paronity-esque (long and detailed 😛 ) post will come shortly with details since my last post, but I just wanted to get this out there first thing in the year so that you guys know that I AM READY.
@2016: Give me your best shot. Give me your worst. I have the strength, beliefs, and support I need to withstand anything. Have at it. 🙂
PS: Happy New Year to everyone. God bless.